top of page

Bedwetting Boys Support Corner

Support group ideas

The idea for the support corner came from one of the newest members of the group, whose identity I will not reveal as we have not agreed on it. I found the idea so good that I immediately overtook it and promised to elaborate on it.

Would it not be nice to know more about each other:

  • what kind of diapers do we use

  • if we wear different diapers day and night

  • what kind of plastic pants do we use

  • who changes us (if not yourself)

  • how often we wet

  • if we wet in certain situations

  • if our wetting has a certain pattern

  • if we wet as well day as night

  • if we wear diapers to school

  • if we wear plastic pants to school

  • how we handle being punished for wetting if we are

  • how we handle staying over at friends' places

  • how we handle having friends staying over at our places

  • how we handle staying over night at sports- and other leisure events

  • how we handle spending vacations by other family members

  • how we handle having various caretakers when our parents are out/away

  • how we handle telling friends about having a wetting issue

  • how we handle telling friends about wearing diapers and plastic pants

  • how we handle friends who tease because we wear diapers and plastic pants

  • how we handle telling teachers, trainers, scout leaders and the like

  • how we handle being rejected, isolated and denied participation at different events because of our wetting issue

  • what we think about other ways of handling it than diapers and plastic pants (alarms, medicine, surgery, be woken up in the night to pee)

NOW IT IS ENTIRELY UP TO YOU

bedwettingboys@gmail.com

Embarrassment

Embarrassment is a well known feeling for many children. Not least boys who wet, and are forced to or by their own choice wear diapers and plastic pants at night. Some boys wear diapers and plastic pants to school, and face other challenges. Some parents actively use as well their boys' embarrassment and shame to gain control through humiliation. I think that is wrong. But I know a great deal of boys who struggle with exactly that as part of their everyday life, because that is the way they are disciplined and punished.

I did a little research. Embarrassment is a complex feeling containing shame, guilt, remorse and anger. But what is there to be embarrassed about. Often the feeling is created in our heads without really having any connection to reality. It should be normal to wear diapers and plastic pants at home, be changed by parents, older brothers and older relatives. They do not change us or tell us to put on diapers and plastic pants because they aim at embarrassing us, but because we actually need to wear diapers and plastic pants because of our wetting issue. Bare that in mind, if you feel embarrassed. Ask them to change the way they approach your change, if you have changes that make it more comfortable or less embarrassing for you.

Why are we embarrassed? Going through puberty makes us much more shy about our body and its development. We grow taller, grow hair in different places, grow muscles and not least experience changes in gentiles. Their change change the balance of hormones in our body. At times that can give us some emotional roller coasters, altering between joy and anger, remorse and revenge and other extreme feelings. The worst scenario is when we do not understand our feelings and why we have them. That makes it difficult to deal with them in a reasonable way.

What are we embarrassed about? My experience is that I am most embarrassed about being nude, display gentiles to dad in relation to having my self diapering process checked or getting changed by dad (or others). It makes you want to hide in a hole or at least be able to cover up the body parts that you do not want to display. But think about it? Many of you participate at sports where you dress, redress and shower with other boys your age. If you think about it, actually it should be worse than doing the same thing in front of the person in the world who knows you best: Your dad.

 

If he has chosen to put you in diapers and plastic pants because of your wetting, there is not a lot you can do. I will strongly advice you not to fight his choice, and trust him as an authority and a loving parent at the same time. He diapers and puts you in plastic pants due to a wetting issue. He probably does it after thorough consideration among better alternatives.

I fully accept my dad's regime for diapers and plastic pants. I have stopped fighting it a long time ago. It only caused me trouble and punishment. Yes, I am still embarrassed but I have almost outgrown that feeling with dad. Let me hear what you think, and what experiences you have made.

Mark

The text is written together with and approved by my dad

WETTING DIARY

(started on the 8th of May 2017)

  • Dry

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Dry

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants, wet bed sheets, =O

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • 2d5w1s

  • W20-2017

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Dry

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Dry

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, almost full diaper

  • Wet, almost full diaper

  • 2d5w

  • W21-2017

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Dry

  • Dry

  • 2Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Dry

  • Wet, almost full diaper

  • 3d4w

  • W22-2017

  • Dry

  • Wet, almost full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Dry

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Dry

  • 3d4w

  • W23-2017

  • Dry

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Dry

  • Wet, almost full diaper

  • Dry

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • 3d4w

  • W24-2017

  • Dry

  • Dry

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Dry

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants, wet bed sheet, =O

  • 1806 Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • d34w1s

  • W25-2017

  • Dry

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, almost full diaper

  • Dry

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full diaper

  • 2d5w

  • W26-2017

  • Dry

  • Dry

  • Dry

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, little amount of pee

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, almost full diaper

  • 3d4w

  • W27-2017

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Dry

  • Dry

  • Dry

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants, wet bed sheets, =O

  • 3d4w1s

  • W28-2017

  • Dry

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Dry

  • Wet, little amount of pee

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Dry

  • Dry

  • 4d3w

  • W29-2017

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Dry

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • 1d6w

  • W30-2017

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Dry

  • Dry

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, little amount of pee

  • 2d5w

  • W31-2017

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of pee

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Dry

  • Wet, little amount of pee

  • 1d6w

  • W32-2017

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Dry

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Dry

  • 2d5w

  • W33-2017

  • Dry

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Dry

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • 2d5w

  • W34-2017

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Dry

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Dry

  • 2d5w

  • W35-2017

  • 2808 Dry

  • 2909 Dry

  • 3008 Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • 3108 Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • 0109 Wet, full diaper

  • 0209 Wet, little amount of diapers

  • 0309 Wet, leaked diaper, leaked plastic pants, wet bedsheets, =O

  • 2d5w

  • W36-2017

  • 0409 Wet, little amount of urine

  • 0509 Wet, full diaper

  • 0609 Wet, full diaper

  • 0709 Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • 0809 Wet, full diaper

  • 0909 Wet, little amount of urine

  • 1009 Wet, full diaper

  • 0d7w

  • W37-2017

  • 1109 Wet, full diaper

  • 1209 Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • 1309 Wet, full diaper

  • 1409 Wet, full diaper

  • 1509 Wet, little amoung of urine

  • 1609 Wet, full diaper

  • 1709 Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • 0d7w

  • W38-2017

  • 1809 Wet, full diaper

  • 1909 Wet, little amount of urine

  • 2009 Wet, little amount of urine

  • 2109 Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • 2209 Wet, full diaper

  • 2309 Wet, full diaper

  • 2404 Dry

  • 1d, 6w

  • W39-2017

  • 2509 Wet, full diaper

  • 2609 Wet, full diaper

  • 2709 Wet, full diaper

  • 2809 Wet, little amount of urine

  • 2909 Wet, little amount of urine

  • 3009 Dry

  • 0110 Wet, full diaper

  • 1d6w

  • W40-2017

  • Dry

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, little amount of pee

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full diaper

  • 1d6w

  • W41-2017

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Dry

  • 1d6w

  • W42-2017

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Dry

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, full diaper

  • 1d6w

  • W43-2017

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, leaked diaper, leaked plastic pants, wet bedsheets, =O on the 29th of October 2017

  • 0d7w

  • W44-2017

  • Dry

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Dry

  • 2d5w

  • W45-2017

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants. Sick. Diapered and plasticpanted during the day

  • Dry. Sick. Diapered and plasticpanted during the day.

  • Dry

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • 2d5w

  • W46-2017

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, full diaper

  • 0d7w

  • W47-2017

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • 0d7w

  • W48-2017

  • Dry

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • 1d6w

  • W49-2017

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • 0d7w

  • W50-2017

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full duaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Dry

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • 1d6w

  • W51-2017

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • 0d7w

  • W52-2017

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Dry

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full diaper

  • W01-2018

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, leaked plastic pants, wet bedsheets, =O on the 2nd of January 2018

  • Dry

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • 1d6w

  • W02-2018

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Dry

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, leaked diaper, leaked plastic pants, wet bedsheets, =O on the 14th of January 2018

  • 1d6w

  • W03-2018

  • Dry

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • 1d6w

  • W04-2018

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • 0d7w

  • W05-2018

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Dry

  • 1d6w

  • W06-2018

  • Dry

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • 1d6w

  • W07-2018

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • 0d7w

  • W08-2018

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Dry

  • Wet, full diaper

  • 1d6w

  • W09-2018

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Dry

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, leaking plastic pants =O for wet bed sheets

  • 1d6w

  • W10-2018

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Dry

  • 1d6w

  • W11-2018

  • Dry

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, fill diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, almost full diaper

  • 1d6w

  • W12-2018

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Dry

  • Dry

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Dry

  • Wet, leaked diaper, leaked plastic pants, wet bedsheets, =O on the 25th of March

  • Wet, full diaper

  • 2d5w

  • W13-2018

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, leaked diaper, leaking plastic pants =O for wet bed sheets

  • Wet, leaked diaper, leaking plastic pants =O for wet bed sheets

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants. Bedwetter plastic sheet put on my bed

  • Dry

  • 1d6w

  • W14-2018

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, almost full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Dry

  • Wet, full diaper. Bedwetter plastic sheet taken of my bed.

  • Wet, leaked diaper, leaking plastic pants =O for wet bed sheets. Bedwetter plastic sheet put on my bed

  • Wet, full plastic pants

  • 1d6w

  • W15-2018

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, almost full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Dry

  • Wet, fill diaper

  • 1d6w

  • W16-2018

  • Wet, leaked diaper, wet plastic pants

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Wet, little amount of urine

  • Wet, full diaper

  • Dry

Considering sports college, part 1

 

These days, my Dad is looking into the options to let me to to sport college for a year. He left a message informing briefly about my wetting issue. This one school answered that it was no problem for them, and that their handling of the issue would depend on how it was dealt with at home. Below you find Dad's first mail.

Hi, Charlotte!

Thank you for your email and your calls.

I can see that hidden numbers have called me. Unfortunately, I was not able to answer the calls. Nor have I been able to call back as the number was hidden.

Marks bedwetting is caused by his bladder being too small compared with his age. Mark should outgrow his condition with age.

Mark has been to several examinations, among them some very unpleasant ones with a camera inside the penis. Furthermore, he has been scanned. Everything looks fine apart from the size of his bladder.

Mark and I have reached a common understanding that the best solution for him is to wear diapers and plastic pants at night. Medicine may not help and has side effects. An alarm would disturb his sleep. Besides diapers and plastic pants, Mark has strict instructions not to drink anything a couple of house before bedtime. He only wets at night.

The combination of diapers AND plastic pants is a bit unusual. Advocating for the choice, the use of plastic pants lovers the demand to the absorbency of his diaper in order to keep the bed dry. In that way you enable the use of a thinner diaper, more discrete, which is barely noticeable if you do not know that Mark is wearing a diaper. Right how he alters between the brands, DryNites and Satessa, which was on sale in Aldi some time ago. Both brands are pull-up, which look like ordinary underpants – and can be reused 2-3 times if they are not wet in the morning.

Socially we have dealt with Mark being diapered and plasticpanted at night by having chosen a handful of boys. I have made contact with their parents and told them about Marks problem and our the solution we have agreed on here. All parents responded positively, which means that Mark can stay over at their place, and he can have them staying over here, without having to find himself in awkward and embarrassing situations. Mark is quite open about his problem if he feels safe.

Soccer club and schools have been informed to take the necessary measures in case of staying overnight. On school trips he sleeps with one of the friends who knows about his bedwetting. The rare occasions where he has been away with his soccer club, arrangements for a single room have been made. The support for Mark, his situation and our way of dealing with it has been fine all the way around.

If Mark was to start at your sport college, it will be in the 9th grade. As I see it, we have two solutions to his wetting problem. Either his roommates are informed, or Mark gets a single room to his disposal (which I will pay for). I do not know if you think it is necessary to inform the parents of his roommates.

Furthermore, Mark will need the adult in charge of the rooms to check that everything runs according to the rules. You need to control that wet diapers are taken care of in a sanitary way. You need to check if urinated plastic pants are washed and hung to dry, and make sure that his plastic pants are intact.

In case of accidents at home, the urinated bedsheets are washed without further comments. But an accident is followed by some days of checking if his diapering process runs accordingly to rules set, and to establish certainty that he is careful enough diapering and plasticpanting himself, focusing enough on the small details.

I am looking forward to hearing from you

Nick

Staying over at friends

I sometimes have friends staying over. I piked a handful with dad. Dad contacted their  parents, told them about my wetting issue and that it was handled by diapering and plasticpanting me. Luckily parents all responded positively.

I have 5 friends who can stay over, and I can stay over at their places. That is cool because we can be more together, play computer, play soccer, run and just goof around.

My best friend, Anders, wets too. We use each others' diapers staying over so I just have to bring my plastic pants.

With the others who do not wet, i go to the bathroom to change to diapers and plastic pants before bed. I wear pyjamas or shorts at stay overs sometimes, if their parents tell me to, but I prefer not to as diapers and plastic pants are warm enough as it is.

TYPES OF DIAPERS

Drynites

Diaper pants. Easy to handle and almost invisible worn outside the house but not very absorbent. The fit is tighter than other diapers of the same type Requires plastic pants. This is the diaper that I use.

Pampers Jams

Very much like DryNites. Just as easy to handle and just as invisible worn under normal clothing. A little more absorbent. By smaller amount of urine no plastic pants needed. Goes up only to 39 kg though

Tena pants

Famous tape diaper. The tape is easy to adjust. It should be able to handle by yourself if properly instructed, and checked for mistakes in start phase. Dood absorbency. No need for plastic pants unless you are a heavy wetter. Comfortable for night use. Day use less comfortable, especially if wet. Very visible worn under normal clothes.

GoodNites

GoodNites are very much like DryNites but they are not available in Danish supermarkets so if Danes want them  they have to buy them online. They are almost just as thin as DryNites so plastic pants will be necessary as extra protection in most cases. They seem a little wider in the crotch but I have only tried them once.

Star

Star tape diaper comes in different versions with various absorbencies. Most Star diapers do not require plastic pants. It is my experience that the outside plastic coating is  very rustling but it has been a while since I last tried them.The Star diaper seller is famous for his catalogues where you find very good pictures of diaper boys. Maybe the brand is more famous for its diaper boy pictures than for their diapers?

ABU preschool

It is comfy, and it holds a lot of pee like 42 oz. It's cloth backed diaper is very soft and the landing strip is very good. The tape used is really good. The diaper can be reused in case of a dry night. Plastic pants necessary

By Ralph Tulu

ABU Space Diaper

The diaper is very unique and comfortable. It is a tape diaper. It gives your butt and crotch a very big hug, which is nice considering that you don't want a loose diaper . The quality and thickness is very good.It can be worn with or without plastic pants. It holds, a lot, and took me 10 wettings and a messings to make it sag. I give it a 10/10

By Breaden Love Tbdl

Satessa Hygiene Pants

Dad is testing SHP on me these days. And dad has chosen.  It is thicker than DryNites and absorbs better, which I seem to need now as I am older. Now I can feel a small bulk between my legs when I am diapered. Absorbency is at least doubled, which makes me feel dryer when I wake up in the morning. SHG it is still quite thin compared with its' absorbency, and can still be worn almost invisible under my clothes outside the hose if dad orders me too. That is important for dad who often orders me to wear diapers and plastic pants on longer rides. SHG is still to be worn with plastic pants. That was really a relief because I like my plastic pants much more than my diapers.

Bambino Bellissimo diapers

These are very thick and very comfortable. While not the thickest diapers I have tried they do hold a lot. My parents will use the Quadro booster pads for even more absorbency (those too are soft and comfortable). With both I can go 12 hours between changes. While I am not a fan of the babyish design, they are a good tape landing zone keeping the diaper secure. The leg gathers and elastic waist are good at keeping everything in meaning plastic pants aren't necessary. But for added protection, my parents still use plastic pants. The outer plastic does rustle, but they are thin enough and discreet enough to wear under baggy clothes.
 

These diapers fit well and are comfortable, and definitely worth it!

By Robert O

Dad once asked how I felt about diapers and plastic pants

First I was very surprised that dad asked in the first place. He is very strict with most things and does not normally listen to my opinion when it comes to his rules.

Second it is a complex question to ask, and even more complicated for me to to answer but I will try.

I wear them due to a bladder condition that I should outgrow. But it seems to go slower than expected.

The first thing that crosses my mind is that my feelings are very mixed. It is annoying to be my age and still have to wear diapers and plastic pants at night.

 

I wrote a little about about embarrassment above but I guess it is the feeling that covers my stand to the question best. Dad still checks almost daily if I have done it well by ensuring that the elastics of my plastic pants sit tight enough to avoid leaks in case if a full diaper. It is very embarrassing to have intimate parts of your body checked by your dad at that age, even though he tries to do it as well as he can.

Shame is another key word. I am simply very ashamed that I still need diapers and plastic pants. I should have gained bladder control by now. Only around 2% of boys my age are in the same situation as me.

Irritation also describes my feelings well but that is more on a practical level with the extended laundry issue and dad's very strict regime on hygiene.

Unpredictability is also annoying. As you can see in my wetting diary above, my wetting does not fit into a fixed pattern. Therefore it is difficult to plan social activities involving more than already know about my wetting (I have written about how dad and I found some friends who know about my wetting). If I am on trips with my school or soccer clubs dad has to make special arrangements to provide a private place where I can sleep or make sure that I get to sleep in a room where my room mates are informed about my wetting.

Mainly negative aspects have been carried forward until now but I also see positive things.

Diapers and plastic pants make me feel very secure and safe. I do not mind wearing them now. Earlier I used to fight dad's regime but lost. I have been diapering my self from age 9 where dad switched to from tape diapers to DryNites and SGA pull-on plastic pants, which I could handle myself. My struggle against his regime, the practical approach not having to diaper me and the financial thing with DryNites being easier to reuse than tape diapers convinced him.

All in all I am happy about wearing diapers and plastic pants now. I have settled down and accepted dad's regime and the power behind it. I am happy that I have a social life that works where I can have friends over and stay over by them. I am also happy not to be woken up by an alarm in the night or having dad taking me to the toilet during the night, because it means that I get my sleep. And not least I am happy that dad is generally against medication.

I tend to be more and more positive about wearing diapers and plastic pants. They are not at all uncomfortable to wear. I even think that I look cool in diapers and plastic pants or just plastic pants, which seem to have kind of a stimulating, sexual effect somehow.

The text has been written together with and approved by my dad.

Considering sports college, part 2

 

These days, my Dad is looking into the options to let me to to sport college for a year. He left a message informing briefly about my wetting issue. This one school answered that it was no problem for them, and that their handling of the issue would depend on how it was dealt with at home. Below you find Dad's second mail.

Hi, Charlotte!

Thanks for offering us to visit your sport college. I will get back to about that.

Principally I am against single rooms as well. As you write, you risk isolation. Furthermore, a single room would drag more attention to Marks bedwetting problem, showing him as a kid with special needs. Well, he is. But you do not need to be that explicit about it.

It sounds excellent that you have boys whom you can trust, and among whom you could pick as suitable roommates for Mark. I imagine that it is now always easy to create rooms that work well from the very beginning. Which criteria do you use when you decide who will be roommates? Age, interests, knowing each other in advance, which activities they have picked?

The handling of diapers and plastic pants is in practice an act of good balancing. On one side I agree that you should not make a big thing out if it. On the other hand, it is extremely important that Mark

  • Uses diapers and plastic pants precisely as instructed

  • Uses then every night

  • Dispose dirty diapers correctly

  • Wash and hang his plastic pants to dry if they are wet from urine

  • Showers and washes thoroughly every morning, especially after wet nights

 

I strongly believe in the importance of controlling these things. By that I mean that the person responsible for the rooms is physically present at night around bedtime and in the morning when Mark wakes up.

The person responsible has to keep an close eye on the details surrounding the procedures in order not to tempt Mark to loosen his focus on the details of the routine learned at home. Who has that responsibility at your school (male, female, experienced, less experienced)?

It is also very important that Mark has a discrete place where he can put his diapers and plastic pants on before bedtime and take it off in the morning without being disturbed. I assume that all rooms have bath and toilette. In that case, there are no problems.

Second last thing I need to know about facilities of the room: Size, what kind of bed, size of his wardrobe and the possibility of washing and drying his plastic pants in his room.

  • The size is less important as I assume that the boys only use it for sleep and during study time and maybe some socializing in the evenings before bedtime.

  • Which kind of is used? Is it possible to store bedsheets, pillow, rubber sheet and the like in a drawer under the bed? Is it possible to use fitted sheets on the mattress? It helps keeping the rubber sheet in place if needed.

  • Place in the wardrobe is important as Marks diapers occupy quite some space. To get his diapers as cheap as possible, I always buy a large amount. There are 10-15 diapers in a package. If he wets every night, he uses almost a package of diapers a week, which again means that he will have to have 2-3 packages stored. That requires some space.

  • Finally, there is the thing with being able to wash and hang his plastic pants to dry. It should be possible to wash them in the bathroom sink but is there any drying facility in the room? I am aware that all other laundry goes somewhere else to be washed but Marks plastic pants should not be displayed openly to other pupils. A solution could be a hook behind the door in his room or just leave the plastic pants to dry on the radiator. The heat makes them softer and more comfortable to wear.

 

As the very last thing I have to ask you is that I need an overview on

  • Study time

  • Meal times

  • Breakfast, what is served

  • Training times

  • The amount of spare time

  • The possibility for activities in the spare time

  • Training frequency

  • Number of hours spent on other forms of training (running, fitness, technical training, other forms of supporting training, i.e. swimming)

  • Requirements for standard equipment

  • Requirements for special equipment

  • HOW DO YOU ENSURE THAT RULES ARE KEPT?

  • WHAT CONSEQUENCES DO BREAKING THE RULES HAVE

 

The nine top dots are the most important. I am convinced that quite strict rules are necessary of a boys’ community has to be well-functioning, in order to create an environment focused on learning and training. Even so it is important that breaking the rules has significant consequences.

About Mark in brief: He is a Good boy, extrovert boy with a calm temper, skilled clearly above average in all subjects, especially languages: He communicates in English with his biological mother and in Germen with his foster grandfather to practice. Extremely interested and keen in soccer training and running, showing good sportsmanship and a high degree of responsibility for the team. Well-educated, good manners, emphatic, helpful (used to many duties at home), a good friend, likes order, eats what is served.

Best regards

Nick

You thought you knew, but sometimes you really have not got a clue about things 

A month ago i found out that my best friend from soccer wets too, and that his dad also keeps him diapered and in plastic pants. I found out as his dad asked my dad if he could stay for some days. It was all decided in a rush so his dad did not have the time to buy diapers. A had to use my stuff. I had never guessed that but cool for us both.

Now we can chat about it and support each other. Cool to share secrets like this with someone you really like and respect and look up to as friend (and soccer player).

We are both a little shy about when we are together in diapers and plastic pants. A is used to be changed by his dad so wearing my DryNites and be able to handle diapering on his own was new for him.

 

Wearing plastic pants was also new for him. His tape diaper is so thick that plastic pants are not needed as extra protection.

 

My dad thinks it is more important that I can handle my own diapering so he chose a very thin diaper, which then requires plastic pants as extra protection. I have to find out what A prefers.

The text has been written together with and approved by my dad

Telling friends

At an early age it became clear to my dad

that my wetting issue could weaken my

possibilities to stay over at friends' places

and having friends staying over at our place. Therefore dad and I picked a handful of friends. Dad called their parents, and told them about my wetting issue, and that it was handled with diapers and plastic pants. It was then for them to decide weather to tell their sons, and for them to decide if they were okay with having me staying over at their place, and have their sons staying over here. Some of the parents took some time to think. But all asked parents responded positively to dad's information. They stay over here, and I stay over there. I am happy that my wetting issue does not isolate me socially.

One of my best friends wets too, and is kept diapered and plasticpanted at night, just like me. It makes feel good, comfortable and less alone having a soul mate like him. We have no secrets from each other, and we are open about wearing and putting plastic pants on.

At first it was a little embarrassing to be together in diapers and plastic pants but not it is okay cool to change before bed and play or game wearing diapers and plastic pants. Favourite game these days is pillow fight but do not get caught by dad.

The text has been written with and approved by my dad

bottom of page