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Bedwetting Boys' corner

 

Survey

You will find the survey at https://markjohansson.typeform.com/to/S4sbPF The survey part of Bedwetting Boys' forum is here to create knowledge about bedwetting boys seen as a group. Everyone knows how he feels about his bedwetting and how his issue is dealt with in his family. Creating knowledge for the us as group enables you to see how many boys have the same feelings or to see if other families deal with their boys' bedwetting issue in a different way than in your own family. Boys tend to think that they are alone with their feelings or problems concerning their bedwetting issue because it is taboo. Our forum wants to break that taboo. Boys should be open about their bedwetting issue, but of course you have to be careful when you choose whom you speak with about it. Filling out the survey is important because it creates knowledge, give you an opportunity to break the taboo (if it is a taboo for you), and at the same time stay anonymous.

Accept, support and identity

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Suffering from bedwetting means dealing with and facing some very obvious obstacles. The older you are, the more rare it is to wet bed, unless of course, you suffer from a medical condition or is disabled. 

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Being a teenage boy and wet bed is of course annoying. Boys tend to feel alone, ashamed, embarrassed and even humiliated. Most of these feelings emerge simultaneously with facing puberty where boys struggle with a changing body and the rise of sexuality. That is an unfortunate coincidence.

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If boys feel respected despite their bedwetting issue they tend to open and are more willing to talk with others about it. As the issue is most often dealt with in the family, it is natural to talk about there. But there are families, which are not able to create a social environment where boys feel safe enough to talk about. In that case boys find other adults like counsellors, teachers, social workers, coaches or even friends. 

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To my surprise I found out that one of my best friends from the soccer team also had a bedwetting issue, and that the issue was dealt with in the same way as my dad deals with mine. It felt really good not to be alone with it.

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Parents know their boys. Talk with them. Talk to them in a guiding tone. Help them find solutions that prevent social isolation from their friends. Help them accept wearing diapers and plastic pants by not making a fuss about the diapering process, if you choose that solution.

 

Tell them that they are just as cool as any other boys, maybe even cooler, because they live with their bedwetting. Tell them that they are not alone. Tell them that you respect them. Tell them that you love them. That way boys grow enough self confidence to live their own life with family, friends, school and sports.

Your place

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This is your spot. Here you can have your things published. Contributions may be sent to bedwettingboys@gmail.com I will look through it and decide whether to bring it on here or not. Please note that contributions have to be interesting for as many readers as possible.

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Interesting things for most people would be about your thoughts and feelings about your issue, how it is handled in your family, how your brothers see it, if your friends know about it, how and why you chose to tell friends about it, whether you can have friends stay over and stay over at their place, whether you can participate at school and at sports and training camps, if special arrangements are made to enable participation and what the content of these special arrangements is.

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I hope you find it attractive to write and see if you have your things published. And remember, published or not, thinking and bringing thoughts down on paper is never bad.

Persuasive but firm

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To get back to how to approach teenage boys about wearing diapers to bed I think the parents should be gentle but firm.

 

Some parents are from the “my way or the highway” school of parenting and while that approach might be necessary with some youngsters and in some situations and circumstances

 

The parents should put themselves in the youngster's place. They should be empathetic and help them realize that it is in the teenage boy's best interest to wear the diapers and plastic pants to bed.

 

As I said you need to emphasize to them that people of all ages wet the bed and many of them use diapers at night otherwise they would not manufacture so many different sizes. Tell them that since there are so many different styles of diapers-tape-on, pin-on, pull-on etc that must mean that there are advantages to some of them with certain people and in certain circumstances.

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You may let your teenage boy choose the diapers he finds best for him within the range of choice you have set. The teenage boy has to choose the kind of diapers, that meet his needs.

 

Whereas the teenage boy seems to emphasize design and thickness of the diapers, it is your responsibility to ensure that his choice of diaper based on his criteria actually meets his needs of absorbancy.

 

I would stress to them that although wearing diapers might be unpleasant, the alternative waking up in cold and soaking with wet sheets is a lot worse.

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Martin, dad of 15 yo bedwetting son

Teenage boys' diaper change

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The process of changing a teenager's diaper is similar to changing a baby's diaper, however special considerations exist. Ensure that you maintain respect for the teen's body and provide privacy as much as possible.

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  1. Ensure you have all the materials you will need close to you before you begin the diaper-changing process.

  2. Lay a mat or blanket on the floor or on a bed. This will protect the area from any leaks or smears that might occur during a diaper change. Ask an assistant to help you move the teen if you can't do this yourself.

  3. Ask the teen to lie on the mat; if the teen is not self supportive, lay the teen on the mat yourself. If the teen is already in bed and cannot move, lift his legs and buttocks and place a mat underneath.

  4. Remove his pants and the diaper. Place it away from the teen, out of reach, as he may reach for it or kick it unknowingly, which could cause a mess.

  5. Clean his body thoroughly with wipes. Be sure to clean the area well to get rid of all the urine

  6. Apply diaper rash ointment if a rash is pre-existing. Creams will help seal the skin and block it from further moisture while it heals. A cream with zinc oxide will relieve the pain of diaper rash and provide an ideal healing environment. Allow the diaper area to dry before you replace the diaper.

  7. If using a diaper with tabs, slide the new diaper under the teen and fasten. If you are using a diaper that slides on, put it on much like you would a pair of underwear. You may then re-dress.

Force if necessary

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Many teenage boys feel babyish about bedwetting and a large number of people feel that by forcing them to wear diapers and plastic pants to bed you are taking the decision about how to deal with the bedwetting out of their hands thereby making them feel even more like a baby.

 

The parent must remember that the responsibility lay on him, and that it is okay to make decisions, which are in best interest of the teenage boy, even though the teenage boy may not like it. I am sure you have already done that in other situations.

 

Is it such a stretch to apply some reasoning to the use of diapers plastic pants to manage bedwetting? Besides I would think it would be less embarrassing and stressful for the teenage boy to wear diapers and plastic pants to bed than other solutions that disturb the sleep pattern.

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In my eyes you are not a parent of you are unable to make unpopular decisions. If you find diapers and plastic pants to be the best solution for your teenage boy, then implement your decision, and if necessary with force.

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Todd, dad of two bedwetting boys (13, 15)

About the pictures

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The pictures are meant to be inspirational for you guys who think, that it looks stupid and childish to wear diapers and plastic pants. I want to show you happy boys and guys for whom diapers and plastic pants are a natural part of their clothing because they need it. I also, want so show, that diapered guys can be as well handsome and sexy, and that wearing diapers and plastic pants is nothing to be ashamed of. Lift your head up, Be proud that you are a good and obedient boy who does what your parents tell you to. I am sure that this piced of advidce will make you more beautiful and happy.

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